literally had 100 drinks last night.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
Did we have sex last night?
I think that was the general idea until I got you undressed and you puked on me.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
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