highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
Church boner. Awkwardddd
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
Randomize
