the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Almost caused a huge accident on the highway because I was distracted by how orange the road barrels were
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Randomize
