It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I just accidentally deep throated a popsicle in front of my parents
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
A girl I had a drunken hook up with is on interventon right now
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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