Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
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