Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
He's cute when he's drunk, too. Also he tried to fight my door...
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
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