No, we just ended up walking around in his pool high and singing songs by The Wiggles.
just hang any plant up and call it mistletoe.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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