in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
he told me I talked like a deaf person
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Don't you hate falling asleep on the couch with a glass of wine in your hand? It's like dreaming about peeing and then realizing you've peed the bed only stickier.
tell me about the fingering
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize
