fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
this is a mass text to all the people i smoke weed with. I have Mono, so if we've shared a bong/pipe. sorry man.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Just so you know sleeping with you is like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
That's the most romantic thing I've ever heard
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
