Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
We lived together for a year and neither of us knew we were both gay.
It was pretty bad. Like cum-on-my-face-while-singing-Let-It-Snow bad.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
