Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
she just built a cabin out of hotdogs and cooked it in the microwave.
now she is shaking the plate and mumbling "this is what california must feel like"
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
He threw me a bud light and when I opened it he smacked it out of my hand because "Dave giveth, and Dave taketh away". WTF
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I need to have some sort of hot sex experience in a mask.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Is the party worth it?
I am drink. Beer pony and singing.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Randomize
