I'm pretty sure a girl doesn't give it up with a reverse cow girl...
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
At first I was a little embarrassed for sharting, but then i realized it was a bachelor party, and I went balls to the wall
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
I saw a drunk guy run across the street with an American flag between his buttcheeks.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
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