well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
He was able to grab love handles during doggy style... I know we said spring break mexico diet starts next week but i think we need to start tomorrow.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
How external is "for external use only"?
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
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