So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I didn't have time to wash my hair yesterday. Ended up spraying some Febreeze on it.
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Randomize
