hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Best news of the day: the hot chick at the funeral was NOT related to me... Thank god
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
