the best thing about tacos is after you shit them all out you feel like to have room for your dignity to come back
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
i have two emotions: emotionless and blind with rage
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Randomize
