You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
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