So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Barsexuality is the new black.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
