when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
I just woke up and shes still asleep next to me with her vibrator inside her and on. Whats normal protocol for this situation?
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I drove 5 hours to see her. She thanked me by getting shitfaced, inviting her boyfriend over, and making me sleep on the couch after I cooked for them and did the dishes. You're right. I'm a fucking doormat.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Randomize
