my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
you were huddled over the toilet, throwing up, and every few seconds you'd look up and say "this is such a waste of vodka" then put your head back down and start puking again
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
Randomize
