is it bad that i shorted Freddie Mac immediatly after I heard about the CFO?
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
I am mentally ready for anal.
Randomize
