Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
I creeped him on fb. I'm about 90% sure I just blew him in the same tux he wore for his wedding..
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
There was a woman who drank mouth wash to get drunk during her supposed detox...this is def the internship for me!
Randomize
