Screwed.edu
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
there was a trapeze. enough said
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
my liver gets a handicap on account of the whole being diseased thing
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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