She is in my trunk
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Housekeeping just called to see if we were okay bc they came in the room earlier and we didn't move.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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