I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
I'm hurting so bad I actially had to wait for my mini wheats to get soggy before I could eat them..
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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