go do what you do best...puke behind churches
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
I am 95% sure I just heard my cat say "What are you doing home? It's Saturday night."
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
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