At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Turns out I made out with a woman dressed as a unicorn here 10 years ago
Randomize