if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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