yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
