I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I just had sex on my divorce papers. I've never felt so poetic.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
