to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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