remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Randomize
