well you can't waste a boner
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I'm so proud of your ability to turn my Charlie horse last night into anal sex.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
Randomize
