try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
he put a lighter in my cleavage and said "you're like another pocket!"
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
Why would you fall asleep? This is why i cant drink with my lesbian friends anymore. They take my clothes off and get vodka in my top ramen. Only yoouuu can prevent forest fires.
It's time for everyone's favorite Wednesday night game... WHEEL OF. VODKA!!!!!
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I’m home.
I’m aware. I just dropped you off.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
