I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
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