shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
My cat just smacked my blunt from my hand and then put her head in my hand. I don't know how to feel
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize