awkward like he asked me out for a "rest of the summer make out buddy" thing and I kind of had a female testicle retreat moment
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
I had sex with two guys in one day. One on my grandma's couch, one on a golf course. This is the greatest post-surgery accomplishment I could ask for.
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
No, I told him I was busy again this weekend. Eventually he’ll learn. Plus, absence makes the cock grow harder
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