Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
