Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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