clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
he was chasing shots of soco with fistfuls of my birthday cake
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
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