Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
just because she threw up on my junk doesnt mean i dont like asians anymore
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
The tequila covers up the fact that the choco liquor tastes like sadness.
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Randomize