stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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