It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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