Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
Last night I had a dream we played Uno and had sex. You won at Uno, but you lost at sex.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
her facebook's as public as her vagina
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Randomize
