i love accidental penises.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
