1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
