you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
went for icecream. accidentally deepthroated it. my mom gave me a dirty look, but the kid behind the counter looked impressed
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
So as your former husband, I get to give you away at the wedding right?
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
Randomize
