Where did you get a picture of my penis
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
this boner is exhausting
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
It looks like a tornado ripped through our living room and scattered clothes everywhere.
Count the bras. It was a category 3 whorenado ... I convinced the lesbians to come back to the apartment for a bottle of wine.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
