Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
He walked in and put an x made out of tape on the floor. He then announced that he was going to pass out there. Cocky or strategic?
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Hey sorry for being annoying last night, I just realized how many times I yelled "JORDAN!" during and after playing pong.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Yep, that just happened. My mom just gave me a big bag of drugs for my birthday. She even put them in a fancy bag with tissue paper.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
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