ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
I have three paper towels stuck up my vagina. This is not a time to be calm.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
