I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
Brought a cooler and a case to a parade. I'm getting dirty looks since it's 10:30. Telling people it's for the troops.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
Just as I was applauding myself for the best wing man award, I realized we are going to have to burn our futon.
Dude there is a stripper at my door saying she has my birthday present. She knows my name...but it's not my birthday...
God works in mysterious ways my friend.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Don't let me pee the bed... Its going to be one of those weekends
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
