If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
I saw an Asian dude carrying a patchwork denim purse get into a car with two rednecks at the grocery store tonight. Imagine what I could have seen if I had actually done something interesting.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
